"Nintendo is adding too many female characters to its new games!"

sodomymcscurvylegs:

Actual footage of me directing the world’s saddest symphony, just for you:

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readingaroundthemovies:

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i need to date a girl with the initials AG so we can carve SW+AG on benches

Those r my mums initials…,

say hello to your new dad. i see that your tumblr blog contains some vulgar language. you’re grounded

(via pizza)

verylittlebird:

a magician asks you to pick a card - any card, in fact. you do. they ask you to put the card back in the pack - anywhere in the pack, in fact. you do. they walk away. ten years later, your wife gives birth to the six of clubs. “is this your card?” the midwife asks, in a familiar voice.

(via pizza)

I’m meant to be going to Warped Tour today but I didn’t sleep at all last night, I’m suddenly freezing my ass off and feeling kinda light-headed, and I feel like I’m going to be fucking sick. I don’t know what to do.

yessielectriccc:

THIS SHIT GETS ME EVERY GOTDAMN TIMEEEE

(Source: zarialinton, via pizza)

"Don’t marry a man unless you would be proud to have a son exactly like him."

Unknown (via worshipgifs)

Wow

(via likeamightyflame)

(Source: capecodcollegiate, via inner-d3m0ns)

The White Book, formally called The Book of the Brothers, is the tome that records the deeds of every member who has ever served in the three hundred year history of the Kingsguard. It is two feet tall, a foot and a half wide, and a thousand pages thick.The book is kept in the Red Keep in the White Sword Tower, where the knights of the Kingsguard have their sleeping cells. The book is in the uppermost floor of the tower in the room where the seven meet. It is the responsibility of the current Lord Commander of the Kingsguard to update the entries in the book.

(Source: queenrhaellaa, via jaimelannister)